Good Morning! On this day, I awaken to a new beginning. A day that takes me back home to my loved ones. There will be no miles run, and a mind-set change that it is okay to not "get on the road" today. I sometimes have to give myself a permission slip, along with a big dose of self-compassion, to calm the desire to do otherwise. My heart is happy beyond belief to see David, as it's been over three weeks since I've seen his smiling face. My little vacation has been so wonderful, and I'm so grateful for every step.
John is back in Branford, as he wasn't able to make our final destination of Milford yesterday. He really wanted to, but his body did not allow it. He will continue, slowly, toward the bus station of his choosing. I say that, because I've tried to get him to stop, or take a taxi, go to a earlier bus station, or many variations of those things. But he says 'no' every time. He allows zero assistance. I told him today that David and I will come get him, take him wherever he needs to go. No, he says. I asked him to fly back with us and stay with us until he can get back home. No, to that as well. He's very strong-willed and determined, even if going only a few miles a day, to get to his bus station. He says he'll get there on his terms, and he will. I've know him many years, and this is how his mind and body works. I don't take offense to his refusal of assistance, as I understand it very well. He has no time constraints, no family waiting or work responsibilities, so he slowly gets to where he needs to go......now very slowly. His appetite is poor, he cannot tolerate the heat of the day, etc. Its only cold drinks (not warm) that he can tolerate. It's excruciating to watch and hear. But he's resilient, and will get himself there and stop, so that he can heal and get better. It's hard to understand his actions at times, but as endurance folks, it's what we set our minds to - and then do. Especially if there's no one else telling you otherwise. Bad decisions can even seem okay. The desire to make a certain goal is strong. Many times, stronger than our bodies. As I've mentioned before though, this is why he can get across the US. Sheer Determination. Unfortunately, his body has told him otherwise, and he'll go home and recoup. I'll be relieved to know when he gets on that bus! As each day passes, hearing his pain is heartbreaking. I will support his decisions, as I know he would - and does- all my decisions. He's my brother, and I want him to be okay.
Last night, I unpacked my cart. I discarded items no longer needed, and organized what I will be flying back home with. My most interesting thing I'm taking back with me, are the wheels from my cart. They are indestructible, and priceless. My cart is beat up, and had been modified (this crossing) to accommodate a storage box, etc. Which means without wheels and with those modifications, it's not very usable at all. There is a dumpster around here somewhere for its final resting place. I had gotten it off CraigsList for $25.00, and was proud to use it for this event. It served me well. But I'm taking the wheels home.....so when I want to go again.....well, you know. Those wheels will go on my "next" cart.
Unknowingly, yesterday, I would be stopping in a town that has everything. I mean every store under the sun. There was even a Whole Foods!! And within a short walking distance from this (very nice) Super 8, is the Connecticut Post Mall. This mall has a Target in it! Seriously, how did this happen? God is good. He's plopped me in a perfect scenario of gathering what I need to head home. He's put my heart at ease, His Will be done. I could not have planned this any better, as it wasn't me in charge. I know that my faith has lead me to this place and moment, and He's at my side to supply what I need. And has been, the whole way here, and will continue to be in my life. I am so grateful.
I did walk to Target last night, and bought a tote (to transport my wheels in, on the plane), a new pair of shorts and a top, and a new backpack I couldn't resist. It will replace the backpack that I had on the front of my cart displaying my intentions (walk/run) so that people would know there is NO baby in this cart, and what I'm doing. It made a huge difference, as only once did the police "check on me". I did so many things different on this crossing, and it made it more enjoyable and easy. Getting up everyday to go 30-40 miles is hard on your body, so to have a system in place to support that well, was key. It spurs me to know that if/when I tackle this adventure again, it doesn't have to be hard.
David's flight will get in this morning, and I'm about 65 miles away from LaGuardia airport. I asked the Front Desk guy if I could check out at 12, instead of 11 am today (so I won't have to tote my things elsewhere) and can wait here for him. The Front Desk guy said, "How's 12:30 sound?". My eyes almost teared up, as I'm already fragile. I thanked him, and said "Yes, that's wonderful!". God is good.
The sun is shining, it's about 67 degrees, and is the most comfortable weather you could ask for. I opened my motel window to let the fresh air in, and await my loving husband. It would be so easy for me to get to the airport, and not have David take the trouble to come all the way to NY. But whats interesting is, I know that this is a mission we are on together. And David is always 110% on board. And him not coming out here just wasn't an option. That's my baby, always there for me. Always.
I'll take him to Chipotle when he gets here. And cry again, just like I did when I left him 24 days ago.
All my best,
Cyndi
Thursday, August 24, 2017
Wednesday, August 23, 2017
Day 23 - Milford, please
As the rain fell throughout the night, I awoke in a cute motel room, still with the soft sound of sprinkling raindrops. As the rains cleansed everything outdoors, it seemed a metaphor for my own feelings. The sadness and misfortunes I had felt, now seemed silly. In the whole grand scheme of my life, this has been a blessing. Seeing things I've not seen, going places I've never been, but mostly it was about the realization that not everything is going to be as I imagine it to be. There is no place in this process for pity party's or regret. I'll happily take what I've been given, and move forward. There's so many opportunities in front of me. But before I get to those, I take a look back at the last 23 days.
What I knew in my mind before I flew out to Maine, was that no journey of this type is ever the same. And how true that would turn out to be. My main take away for myself personally, was my ability to manage my needs better, then I had on my previous West/East crossing. This has enabled me, for the last three weeks to be able to relax, breathe, and enjoy myself so much more. In essence, this trip has wiped the slate clean for the cumbersome and time-consuming things I had done on my previous trip. I wanted this trip to be easier, so that I could enjoy it more. It could be that I had just gotten a little older, and handle things differently. I did make a concerted effort this time, to not focus on those many tedious efforts from before, but rather to focus on what was going on around me. For me personally, that is my biggest Takeaway. To not get hyper-focused on the little details that don't really matter, but instead, look around and relish life. This is something that I will keep with me in my daily life. A gentle reminder always in my pocket.
I also have a new appreciation for the New England states. Their beauty, the people, the beaches, the vast Atlantic Ocean, and the plentiful shoulder on Route 1. I've honed my camping skills, I'm great at finding secret places to sleep, and my ability to eat banana and peanut butter for multiple meals a day is a plus. I may not have found quesadillas a common denominator in this area, but I did substitute grill cheeses, and found that to be an excellent option I've never really explored.
As my mind is making the shift from the road to back home tomorrow, I can't help but think of the many things that I want to do there. There's always a 1000 things to do on the farm, but the first item on my agenda is to go love on every animal. I may even sleep in the barn. I look forward to Lauren's visit to Texas in September, as I'll be there to see her. And just getting back into a regular day-to-day routine will be a privilege. No matter where I am - on the road or at home - life is good. So it's a win win situation.
I also look forward to John getting back home and getting himself settled as well. There's comfort in that, probably for both of us. As for my plans tomorrow? I made the decision to not go the miles in the morning, despite what my ultrarunner self says to do. Instead, I'm going to unpack my cart, get cleaned up, maybe even sleep in, and have coffee with my breakfast. I'll be ready to hop in the car when David arrives, and we are going to enjoy the day in New York until our flight later tomorrow evening. It will be like a date in New York, for the day. Yep, who am I, you ask? My internal self fights a battle to want to go run those miles. But I'm going to go somewhere new tomorrow, new to me. Happiness is not the finish line. It's the journey, and part of my journey will be spending the day tomorrow, with my sweet husband who came all the way from Texas to come and find me, and take me back home. My heart is filled with excitement to be able to hug his neck.
This partial crossing feels more like a vacation then anything else. I've chosen today to go off Route 1, here and there, and go into the towns, look at the shops, and eat yummy food. The weatherman not only predicted my mood, but my day today by saying the rain will clear to bring a beautiful sunny comfortable day. Not too hot, not too cold. Just right. What more could I want for my last day?
Thanks for being with me, supporting me, and loving me through this journey.
It's not over yet, close, but not yet,
Cyndi
What I knew in my mind before I flew out to Maine, was that no journey of this type is ever the same. And how true that would turn out to be. My main take away for myself personally, was my ability to manage my needs better, then I had on my previous West/East crossing. This has enabled me, for the last three weeks to be able to relax, breathe, and enjoy myself so much more. In essence, this trip has wiped the slate clean for the cumbersome and time-consuming things I had done on my previous trip. I wanted this trip to be easier, so that I could enjoy it more. It could be that I had just gotten a little older, and handle things differently. I did make a concerted effort this time, to not focus on those many tedious efforts from before, but rather to focus on what was going on around me. For me personally, that is my biggest Takeaway. To not get hyper-focused on the little details that don't really matter, but instead, look around and relish life. This is something that I will keep with me in my daily life. A gentle reminder always in my pocket.
I also have a new appreciation for the New England states. Their beauty, the people, the beaches, the vast Atlantic Ocean, and the plentiful shoulder on Route 1. I've honed my camping skills, I'm great at finding secret places to sleep, and my ability to eat banana and peanut butter for multiple meals a day is a plus. I may not have found quesadillas a common denominator in this area, but I did substitute grill cheeses, and found that to be an excellent option I've never really explored.
As my mind is making the shift from the road to back home tomorrow, I can't help but think of the many things that I want to do there. There's always a 1000 things to do on the farm, but the first item on my agenda is to go love on every animal. I may even sleep in the barn. I look forward to Lauren's visit to Texas in September, as I'll be there to see her. And just getting back into a regular day-to-day routine will be a privilege. No matter where I am - on the road or at home - life is good. So it's a win win situation.
I also look forward to John getting back home and getting himself settled as well. There's comfort in that, probably for both of us. As for my plans tomorrow? I made the decision to not go the miles in the morning, despite what my ultrarunner self says to do. Instead, I'm going to unpack my cart, get cleaned up, maybe even sleep in, and have coffee with my breakfast. I'll be ready to hop in the car when David arrives, and we are going to enjoy the day in New York until our flight later tomorrow evening. It will be like a date in New York, for the day. Yep, who am I, you ask? My internal self fights a battle to want to go run those miles. But I'm going to go somewhere new tomorrow, new to me. Happiness is not the finish line. It's the journey, and part of my journey will be spending the day tomorrow, with my sweet husband who came all the way from Texas to come and find me, and take me back home. My heart is filled with excitement to be able to hug his neck.
This partial crossing feels more like a vacation then anything else. I've chosen today to go off Route 1, here and there, and go into the towns, look at the shops, and eat yummy food. The weatherman not only predicted my mood, but my day today by saying the rain will clear to bring a beautiful sunny comfortable day. Not too hot, not too cold. Just right. What more could I want for my last day?
Thanks for being with me, supporting me, and loving me through this journey.
It's not over yet, close, but not yet,
Cyndi
Tuesday, August 22, 2017
Day 22 - The Plan
I feel like a broken record. I say it most days, "That was my favorite day!". Then, I realized that I do love most every day. It's like falling in love over and over. Today is no exception, as the 30-something miles to Clinton, CT was spectacular. I saw the Atlantic Ocean off and on all day, and when I didn't see it, I smelt the beach smells, watched the excitement of the tourist in their beach attire, and passed marina's full of boats. It never rained, although cloudy off and on, which is a nice bonus. I crossed enormous bridges, with convenient pedestrian paths. As I pass through each town along the way, they each have their own personality. In a car, I may not recognize it, but on foot, I see and feel it. New London? Quaint, but only near the water, Waterford? A nice regular town with the convenience of a variety of stores, Old Lyme? Prefers their local people, Old Saybrook? (my favorite of the day) welcomes tourists and caters to most anything you'd like to have, with upscale Inn's and fancy Cabins along the water/beaches, Westbrook? the step sister town with very little tourists opportunities, and not happy to have you passing through, and then my destination, Clinton. I'm staying at the Clinton Motel, just as you come in town. It's a nice, small, 18 room, single story, older motel. They have updated (at least) my room, and I imagine the others as well. There's no furniture or mattresses, except in the motel rooms. It's very clean and tidy! The lady who checked me in immediately recognized me. "I've see you several times today. On my way to work, when I ran errands earlier, and now your here. That was fast!". She had quite a few questions, and then wanted to give me a discount because "I've worked so hard today ". She provided me cold water, and sent me to my room to clean up and rest. I will do that. The room she assigned me has a king bed in it, an updated bathroom, and what I thought was a cute comforter. It's as if I'm staying in someone's Guest Room. I like it. I shower and unpack a bit, getting my things ready for tomorrow. The plan will be to get to Milford, and we have motel reservations at the Super 8 there. It will be another 30-something mile day. Even though John is not feeling well, his 2 mile/hour pace gets him here eventually, and he's just fine with that. He knows he'll be stopping soon. I hesitate to discuss his health issues as it doesn't seem appropriate. Between being a nurse, and HIPPA rules I live by, I will leave his personal information out. He plans on making it to the bus station himself. That's John. I offered him a ride when I do leave too, and he will not take it. He will get there on his own, and I know that about him. He accepts very little assistance from anyone, and figures things out on his own. It's just his personality, which makes him a perfect US crossing partner. But this trip has not served him well. He knows he can't finish, but really wants to touch into NY. His desire to hold true to that goal, and his determination under difficult conditions inspires me. I respect him for being able to say he needs to stop this crossing, and take care of himself.
So with that said, here's the plan, at least for me:
David wants to fly out, rent a car, and come pluck me off the side of the road. Then, we fly back home together. This will happen Thursday, assuming he can find me. Just kidding. Fugitive Cyndi will show herself. I could turn my satellite device off and make it a game. He wouldn't like that. I know, I could get to the airport myself and fly back home, similar to John going to the bus station. But David is making it easy for me, to get me there himself. It does almost sound like he would need to come get me, or I would keep making up excuses on why I need to go "just a little further". I might say something like: I accidentally passed NY, I'll go ahead and head to Philly. Okay, im not going to do that, and Fugitive Cyndi will be so happy when she sees her sweet husband!
So your next question is this: Will you run/walk on Thurday, or stay put and await your ride? I haven't decided, but I will either 1) Stay in Milford and wait for him to drive there from the airport, and pick me up, or 2) get up EARLY Thursday morning and run/walk to the NY line. It would be close to 40 miles, but I would give it a try before David gets to me from the LaGuardia airport. And then have him meet me there, just inside the NY state line. They are both great options! I think I'll decide tomorrow night, after I get settled in Milford.
As I enjoy my evening, I think about how pretty the Atlantic Coast is, and how all this is right here for everyone to enjoy. Why have I not thought about vacationing up here?! I'm so lucky to have seen all these New England states, and throughly enjoyed them all.
As my time winds down up here, I'm allowing myself to get excited about what's to come at home. As unexpected as it is that I'm heading home early, I'm making lists of things (in my head) I want to do around the farm. Lauren is coming to Texas in Sept, and I'll get to see her after all now! Who knew?!
I appreciate my family looking out for my best interest, and voting for my safety first, over adventure. Because I may not be the most responsible one in the group, and certainly could be considered a risk-taker of sorts. I have a lot of love to be grateful for. And as I've mentioned before, my future-self will thank me. But it's hard to see into that crystal ball right now.
Thanks for continuing to support me, and I'm going to see what else Connecticut has to offer, before I head out of here on Thursday. I'm really looking forward to seeing David! Good thing I have him to look out for my best interest. He's my everything, my love and my forever cheerleader.
Let's enjoy a little more first,
Cyndi
So with that said, here's the plan, at least for me:
David wants to fly out, rent a car, and come pluck me off the side of the road. Then, we fly back home together. This will happen Thursday, assuming he can find me. Just kidding. Fugitive Cyndi will show herself. I could turn my satellite device off and make it a game. He wouldn't like that. I know, I could get to the airport myself and fly back home, similar to John going to the bus station. But David is making it easy for me, to get me there himself. It does almost sound like he would need to come get me, or I would keep making up excuses on why I need to go "just a little further". I might say something like: I accidentally passed NY, I'll go ahead and head to Philly. Okay, im not going to do that, and Fugitive Cyndi will be so happy when she sees her sweet husband!
So your next question is this: Will you run/walk on Thurday, or stay put and await your ride? I haven't decided, but I will either 1) Stay in Milford and wait for him to drive there from the airport, and pick me up, or 2) get up EARLY Thursday morning and run/walk to the NY line. It would be close to 40 miles, but I would give it a try before David gets to me from the LaGuardia airport. And then have him meet me there, just inside the NY state line. They are both great options! I think I'll decide tomorrow night, after I get settled in Milford.
As I enjoy my evening, I think about how pretty the Atlantic Coast is, and how all this is right here for everyone to enjoy. Why have I not thought about vacationing up here?! I'm so lucky to have seen all these New England states, and throughly enjoyed them all.
As my time winds down up here, I'm allowing myself to get excited about what's to come at home. As unexpected as it is that I'm heading home early, I'm making lists of things (in my head) I want to do around the farm. Lauren is coming to Texas in Sept, and I'll get to see her after all now! Who knew?!
I appreciate my family looking out for my best interest, and voting for my safety first, over adventure. Because I may not be the most responsible one in the group, and certainly could be considered a risk-taker of sorts. I have a lot of love to be grateful for. And as I've mentioned before, my future-self will thank me. But it's hard to see into that crystal ball right now.
Thanks for continuing to support me, and I'm going to see what else Connecticut has to offer, before I head out of here on Thursday. I'm really looking forward to seeing David! Good thing I have him to look out for my best interest. He's my everything, my love and my forever cheerleader.
Let's enjoy a little more first,
Cyndi
Day 22 - To Clinton, CT
I awoke in my room at the Hampton Inn this morning, to what would seem like the most normal hotel stay I've had yet. I will get to go downstairs and have coffee with my banana and peanut butter. My clothes are all clean, and I'm ready to move down the road today. The first challenge will be to find the pedestrian bridge to cross the Gold Memorial Bridge over the Thames river. This bridge is actually two bridges, composed of a north and south span. The south span has a pedestrian and bike portion, and it's just a matter of finding that entrance to it this morning in the dark. My Maps app keeps telling me to go around, and acts like I can't go across the bridge. I did Google it, and talked to some local people to know that I will be able to cross it on foot.
I'll leave the comfort of my hotel room, and head out the door in the dark. The sun is normally coming up by now, but the clouds are keeping it dark. I have my lights, both flashlight and blinking light ready and going. I head down the sidewalk toward I95 where it has joined Route 1 and begin trying to figure out how to get to the pedestrian bridge. Is it above? Below the car bridge? It's so dark I can't really tell. I'm going back-and-forth on Bridge Street, looking for the so-called little pathway that will take me to the pedestrian portion. After I've passed by the little green sign that says 'To Pedestrian Bridge' three times unknowingly, I finally see it after the third time. I was happy and relieved, to say the least. Now it's time to go get up on that bridge and get across to New London. That was a large river, and very busy down below. I made it to the other side, zigzag'd through New London and got back to Route 1. I have two more bridges today, that supposedly have pedestrian paths on them as Route 1 will join I95 at those junctions. I heard there is a ferry option around that area too, but I'm hoping just to be able to get across the bridges on my own.
John made his final plans on how he will walk to the bus station that he is choosing. We will both be making it into New York - or close to New York - before we both head off the road. I have spent the last day or two thinking about this moment. I've come to realize how fortunate I have been to be able to see the New England states up close and personal. I am at peace with heading back home as well, with no regrets. It's interesting, because after a couple of weeks on the road, the homesickness subsides, and a new strong survival instinct kicks in. You are able to push aside those feelings of missing home, and focus on making it day to day. There's so much to do to take care of yourself, route planning, watching for turns/detours, sleeping/camp/motel planning, among a myriad of other things you never expect to encounter. So as I have moved through these different stages over the last 22 days, I learned many new things each and every day. It makes you realize how strong and resilient we are as humans, and clearly see the instinctual kindness of human beings.
I notice as I move down the road today, I'm not in any hurry, even more so than on any other day. Today, I just want to enjoy the day, enjoy what's around me, and just let myself take my time. This is gorgeous country, and I have no certain time I have to be to Clinton today. It's as if I'm out on a walk, with never ending beauty, and no responsibility whatsoever. I'm just going to take time to breathe.
Happy Day!!
Cyndi
I'll leave the comfort of my hotel room, and head out the door in the dark. The sun is normally coming up by now, but the clouds are keeping it dark. I have my lights, both flashlight and blinking light ready and going. I head down the sidewalk toward I95 where it has joined Route 1 and begin trying to figure out how to get to the pedestrian bridge. Is it above? Below the car bridge? It's so dark I can't really tell. I'm going back-and-forth on Bridge Street, looking for the so-called little pathway that will take me to the pedestrian portion. After I've passed by the little green sign that says 'To Pedestrian Bridge' three times unknowingly, I finally see it after the third time. I was happy and relieved, to say the least. Now it's time to go get up on that bridge and get across to New London. That was a large river, and very busy down below. I made it to the other side, zigzag'd through New London and got back to Route 1. I have two more bridges today, that supposedly have pedestrian paths on them as Route 1 will join I95 at those junctions. I heard there is a ferry option around that area too, but I'm hoping just to be able to get across the bridges on my own.
John made his final plans on how he will walk to the bus station that he is choosing. We will both be making it into New York - or close to New York - before we both head off the road. I have spent the last day or two thinking about this moment. I've come to realize how fortunate I have been to be able to see the New England states up close and personal. I am at peace with heading back home as well, with no regrets. It's interesting, because after a couple of weeks on the road, the homesickness subsides, and a new strong survival instinct kicks in. You are able to push aside those feelings of missing home, and focus on making it day to day. There's so much to do to take care of yourself, route planning, watching for turns/detours, sleeping/camp/motel planning, among a myriad of other things you never expect to encounter. So as I have moved through these different stages over the last 22 days, I learned many new things each and every day. It makes you realize how strong and resilient we are as humans, and clearly see the instinctual kindness of human beings.
I notice as I move down the road today, I'm not in any hurry, even more so than on any other day. Today, I just want to enjoy the day, enjoy what's around me, and just let myself take my time. This is gorgeous country, and I have no certain time I have to be to Clinton today. It's as if I'm out on a walk, with never ending beauty, and no responsibility whatsoever. I'm just going to take time to breathe.
Happy Day!!
Cyndi
Monday, August 21, 2017
Day 21 Evening of change
Leaving the camp site this morning was interesting, as the State Park is truly off Route 1, but tucked back, well way back, nicely. Off course, I'll say. So after a little walk back to Route 1, I was on my way. Today was going to be extra special, as we make our way into Connecticut. Closer to a bus station for John. John is fiercely independent. He's been single his whole life, and relies on no one but himself. Even going maybe 2 miles an hour now, he insists on getting to a bus station on-foot. Sure, he could get a taxi. He would never do that, if you knew him, you would know it's not even an option. He'll get there, on-foot, in a few more days and will be heading out on a bus. I'll be flying back home, likely Thursday. Until then, I keep moving.
I found Connecticut to be very similar to RI! People here would probably beg to differ, but it continues to be gorgeous, green and lush. I enjoyed the day, relaxed, as I went through Westerly, Mystic and into Groton. The weather was mild and quite warm, but with a short day, and stopping to eat a nice sit-down lunch, I rolled in and headed to my motel, The Hilltop Express Inn. I had booked it online and it boosted of 24 hour front desk, breakfast included and sounded really nice. This is where the scary noises should be playing. Dun, dun duuuuuunnnnn. I first noticed the sign out front had a sign over it. Like it was a Howard Johnson or something, and now a temporary sign covers that, announcing The Hilltop Express Inn. I look up at the motel, and there's building materials ALL over the front porch. Okay, they are renovating it, no problem. I get to the front door and it's unlocked. A note on a post-it says "Check In at 3pm". Okay again, I'm early, so I'll just wait here and do a few things. I'll charge my devices, make my sun tea with my gallon of water I had just bought (I put a few tea bags in it, and let it sit outside for an hour or two.). While this is occurring, I'm inside the Front Office. It's not a Front Office really, it's torn up. Walls are being knocked down, lumber stacks everywhere, everything is covered in saw dust. There's what looks to be a make-shift breakfast area, with the toaster on the floor, plugged into a random outlet. There's more sawdust inside the toaster as well. What is happening? Where am I? This place can't possibly be open. I called the number I could find, and a man with English as his third language (for real), tries to tell me "no check in til 3". I tell him I'll wait here. He doesn't seem to understand anything I say. He hangs up frustrated with me, and I'm so confused. There's ONE truck in the parking lot, and one lone worker-man down the first floor hall, at the end, sawing/cutting something. I never see him, only hear him. There's a huge plastic sheet hanging to block the view of where the rooms really are, down that hall. It's like a bomb went off down the hall. I walk up the stairs thinking that's where the rooms are that he rents. He's already fixed those up, I'm sure. I go up there, and there's mattresses everywhere! No one is there whatsoever. I go back downstairs and wait for this man to arrive and will see if there's really a place for me to stay here tonight. He's got all my credit card data online already, and I hate to pay somewhere else again. Now it's 3:30 pm and no man. I call and there's no answer. It's getting creepier by the minute. I can't stay here, this is all terribly wrong. I find a piece of paper, write him a note, asking him to cancel my reservation and not charge me. Who knows what will come of that?! I call my bank and explain what just happened, so we can be watching in case he tries to charge my card. But now, I don't even care about that anymore, as I need to find a place to stay. I start looking around the area and find a Hampton Inn 2 miles away. I make a reservation as I'm walking to it. Success! I text John and tell him to do the same, and what had happened at the crazy motel.
If there's ever an opposite thing happen to me, it's this motel/hotel situation today. I stepped into the Hampton Inn, and smelled fresh cookies. There's coffee 24/7, and dinner of veggie lasagna is free to all guests. They have laundry facilities, and life is normal again. I was in the twilight zone at the Hilltop Express Inn earlier. I've not heard from anyone there, and feel creepy about the whole experience. Almost like it was a joke.
As I plan my day tomorrow, it looks like rain. The destination will be Clinton, CT and I'll be crossing the Gold Memorial Bridge in the morning, heading into New London. I've heard wonderful things about that town. Total mileage will be just over 30 miles, so I hope the rain is not too bad.
I did all my laundry, then made John give me his, and went and threw his in the wash after mine. I thought mine stunk....
Goodnight for now,
Cyndi
I found Connecticut to be very similar to RI! People here would probably beg to differ, but it continues to be gorgeous, green and lush. I enjoyed the day, relaxed, as I went through Westerly, Mystic and into Groton. The weather was mild and quite warm, but with a short day, and stopping to eat a nice sit-down lunch, I rolled in and headed to my motel, The Hilltop Express Inn. I had booked it online and it boosted of 24 hour front desk, breakfast included and sounded really nice. This is where the scary noises should be playing. Dun, dun duuuuuunnnnn. I first noticed the sign out front had a sign over it. Like it was a Howard Johnson or something, and now a temporary sign covers that, announcing The Hilltop Express Inn. I look up at the motel, and there's building materials ALL over the front porch. Okay, they are renovating it, no problem. I get to the front door and it's unlocked. A note on a post-it says "Check In at 3pm". Okay again, I'm early, so I'll just wait here and do a few things. I'll charge my devices, make my sun tea with my gallon of water I had just bought (I put a few tea bags in it, and let it sit outside for an hour or two.). While this is occurring, I'm inside the Front Office. It's not a Front Office really, it's torn up. Walls are being knocked down, lumber stacks everywhere, everything is covered in saw dust. There's what looks to be a make-shift breakfast area, with the toaster on the floor, plugged into a random outlet. There's more sawdust inside the toaster as well. What is happening? Where am I? This place can't possibly be open. I called the number I could find, and a man with English as his third language (for real), tries to tell me "no check in til 3". I tell him I'll wait here. He doesn't seem to understand anything I say. He hangs up frustrated with me, and I'm so confused. There's ONE truck in the parking lot, and one lone worker-man down the first floor hall, at the end, sawing/cutting something. I never see him, only hear him. There's a huge plastic sheet hanging to block the view of where the rooms really are, down that hall. It's like a bomb went off down the hall. I walk up the stairs thinking that's where the rooms are that he rents. He's already fixed those up, I'm sure. I go up there, and there's mattresses everywhere! No one is there whatsoever. I go back downstairs and wait for this man to arrive and will see if there's really a place for me to stay here tonight. He's got all my credit card data online already, and I hate to pay somewhere else again. Now it's 3:30 pm and no man. I call and there's no answer. It's getting creepier by the minute. I can't stay here, this is all terribly wrong. I find a piece of paper, write him a note, asking him to cancel my reservation and not charge me. Who knows what will come of that?! I call my bank and explain what just happened, so we can be watching in case he tries to charge my card. But now, I don't even care about that anymore, as I need to find a place to stay. I start looking around the area and find a Hampton Inn 2 miles away. I make a reservation as I'm walking to it. Success! I text John and tell him to do the same, and what had happened at the crazy motel.
If there's ever an opposite thing happen to me, it's this motel/hotel situation today. I stepped into the Hampton Inn, and smelled fresh cookies. There's coffee 24/7, and dinner of veggie lasagna is free to all guests. They have laundry facilities, and life is normal again. I was in the twilight zone at the Hilltop Express Inn earlier. I've not heard from anyone there, and feel creepy about the whole experience. Almost like it was a joke.
As I plan my day tomorrow, it looks like rain. The destination will be Clinton, CT and I'll be crossing the Gold Memorial Bridge in the morning, heading into New London. I've heard wonderful things about that town. Total mileage will be just over 30 miles, so I hope the rain is not too bad.
I did all my laundry, then made John give me his, and went and threw his in the wash after mine. I thought mine stunk....
Goodnight for now,
Cyndi
Day 21 - The Truth about State Parks
Among many things, this journey has taught me how to be a better camper. Last night at the Burlingame State Park, I know my set-up inside and out. I'll sleep on the picnic table, on my yoga mat, in my sleeping bag, inside my bivy sack. This is the best-ever bivy sack I've had. It keeps my sleeping bag - and me - dry. When you awake in the morning at the campground, generally things are moist. Between the humidity, condensation and morning dew, things are just damp. My bivy sack is my protector.
Campgrounds: I know many of you have camped many times. I am not an experience camper, and have learned what to expect in state parks versus private campgrounds. First, there's a price difference, and at state parks, you can almost guarantee you're going to pay for a shower. No big deal, as it's well worth it It is significantly cheaper to stay at a state park. I noticed the KOA's start now at about $65 a night. They have every amenity that you could possibly imagine, so it is a nice alternative to a motel/hotel. The main difference I've noted is the enforcement of the park rules. The private campgrounds don't mess around. They enforce quiet hours, along with all their personal campground rules, and they have no problem asking anyone to leave, if they deem that necessary. The state parks? Well, the Rangers do come around to check on things, yet enforcement of the rules seem inconsistent and at their discretion. I do enjoy both the public and private campground experience, and find both of them very safe and conducive to the needs of the people. You can only expect so much at a campground. There's typically not any luxury involved, and we all know it when we go camping.That's why we're camping, and I've grown to love it more and more. The bug bites, spiders in the shower, and dogs barking are all part of the ambience. All that fades away as you lay in your sleeping bag and look up at the sky, through the trees to see the thousands of stars. They are there for your pleasure all night long.
As I awaken dry and refreshed, my attitude is refreshed as well. I've made a decision that my future self will thank me for. It's not always easy to recognize it at the time, but there's meaning in all of this. I realize the greatest tragedy would be to have this experience, and miss the meaning. I'm determined to not miss the meaning, and hope to share what it is. Sometimes it's not readily apparent, but becomes clear with time. For now, I can tell you that the courage it takes to say "I need to stop" by John is profound. It sounds easier than it is. Making sound decisions in the mist of a great adventure is precarious. Self doubt and contemplation take over. What is really best seems blurry. I respect John for taking care of himself and knowing his boundaries. I can certainly learn from him in that regard.
Today will be a short day, of about 23 miles to Groton. A motel is in our future, and it will be a nice day to enjoy the road, the food, the weather, AND the State of Connecticut!! The comfort of a motel will be a bonus to all that. I could stand to do a load of laundry, but if not, I'm just going to get sweaty again tomorrow. In the grand scheme of things it's not a huge priority. It's a want rather than a need.
I'm coming into Westerly now, and will go to the grocery store here to buy some fruit, and stash it in my cart. That always makes me smile, too. The sun has risen, the sky is clear, and everyone is busy driving to work. I am so blessed to be where I am, coming up to Connecticut. I've never been here. I feel like I'm in fourth grade again, learning how to spell state names, what their capitals are, and learning about their history. Never a dull moment! The one thing I haven't mastered, is how to say the state of 'Massachusetts. I mispronounce it every time, and am corrected with, "The last syllable of it is NOT 'shits'". (Sorry to have to use that word in my blog!) I'll keep practicing.
Happy Monday!
Cyndi
Campgrounds: I know many of you have camped many times. I am not an experience camper, and have learned what to expect in state parks versus private campgrounds. First, there's a price difference, and at state parks, you can almost guarantee you're going to pay for a shower. No big deal, as it's well worth it It is significantly cheaper to stay at a state park. I noticed the KOA's start now at about $65 a night. They have every amenity that you could possibly imagine, so it is a nice alternative to a motel/hotel. The main difference I've noted is the enforcement of the park rules. The private campgrounds don't mess around. They enforce quiet hours, along with all their personal campground rules, and they have no problem asking anyone to leave, if they deem that necessary. The state parks? Well, the Rangers do come around to check on things, yet enforcement of the rules seem inconsistent and at their discretion. I do enjoy both the public and private campground experience, and find both of them very safe and conducive to the needs of the people. You can only expect so much at a campground. There's typically not any luxury involved, and we all know it when we go camping.That's why we're camping, and I've grown to love it more and more. The bug bites, spiders in the shower, and dogs barking are all part of the ambience. All that fades away as you lay in your sleeping bag and look up at the sky, through the trees to see the thousands of stars. They are there for your pleasure all night long.
As I awaken dry and refreshed, my attitude is refreshed as well. I've made a decision that my future self will thank me for. It's not always easy to recognize it at the time, but there's meaning in all of this. I realize the greatest tragedy would be to have this experience, and miss the meaning. I'm determined to not miss the meaning, and hope to share what it is. Sometimes it's not readily apparent, but becomes clear with time. For now, I can tell you that the courage it takes to say "I need to stop" by John is profound. It sounds easier than it is. Making sound decisions in the mist of a great adventure is precarious. Self doubt and contemplation take over. What is really best seems blurry. I respect John for taking care of himself and knowing his boundaries. I can certainly learn from him in that regard.
Today will be a short day, of about 23 miles to Groton. A motel is in our future, and it will be a nice day to enjoy the road, the food, the weather, AND the State of Connecticut!! The comfort of a motel will be a bonus to all that. I could stand to do a load of laundry, but if not, I'm just going to get sweaty again tomorrow. In the grand scheme of things it's not a huge priority. It's a want rather than a need.
I'm coming into Westerly now, and will go to the grocery store here to buy some fruit, and stash it in my cart. That always makes me smile, too. The sun has risen, the sky is clear, and everyone is busy driving to work. I am so blessed to be where I am, coming up to Connecticut. I've never been here. I feel like I'm in fourth grade again, learning how to spell state names, what their capitals are, and learning about their history. Never a dull moment! The one thing I haven't mastered, is how to say the state of 'Massachusetts. I mispronounce it every time, and am corrected with, "The last syllable of it is NOT 'shits'". (Sorry to have to use that word in my blog!) I'll keep practicing.
Happy Monday!
Cyndi
Sunday, August 20, 2017
The Promise I Made
Back Story: As many of you know, my last US crossing from West to East on US60 was completed mostly on my own. The real exception to that was that John was a day or two behind me (30-60 miles at any given time, give or take some). This occurred first, due to us getting separated in a rain storm. Then, he had cart issues (front wheel) and encouraged me to keep moving forward. I did, and all was well overall, with him still out on the road, but just in different towns at night/morning. We communicated daily and knew where each was at any given time. The problem? I had committed to my family (prior to that crossing) to stay in proximity to my running partner, for safety reasons and to decrease my families worry. I did not abide by that promise and completed the crossing on my own. John did finish as well, 2 days later. Success!
Fast forward to this crossing: I made that same commitment and promise to my family, and pinkie swore, to really stay with my running partner this time. Really, I will! If he stays back, I stay back as well. John and I will set our own pace during the day, but our nightly destinations will be the same. Every night, I guaranteed. Just once so far in these 20 days, John stopped before our arranged destination, due to not feeling well. But we did sync up the next day. I kept to my commitment and promise to be as safe as possible. And having someone else there, esp at night and early morning is vital to what the plan was going to be in order for my family to be "all in" for this crossing. I had my mind-right. I was prepared, and I felt this was a fair request, and something I could do to keep everyone feeling 'okay' about me living on the road.
Yesterday, Day 19: John is still not feeling well. He's having physical/health issues, that won't allow him to be successful on a daily basis as he wishes to be. In order to respect his privacy (he is a private person when it comes to his health) I can tell you that he's been struggling with his ability to perform the miles as he desires to, and/or is able to. He told me yesterday he's going to stop this crossing. I choose not to blog about it at that time, as I had continued discussions with him, as well as tried to sort out my own feelings about what this means for me, as well. John feels certain I will have no problem finishing. But that's not the issue. The physical portion of these miles is not a issue for me, fortunately. BUT, safety is. I made a promise. I made a commitment to my family, ahead of time, to not do this alone. That John and I will be near and/or together daily. Now, he's leaving. When, you ask? In the next 4-6 days approximately. He desires to get to a bus station for his transportation.
What now? Good question! David just about hopped a plane to come fetch me. But, we have agreed that I will continue this week, until I know John's final bus plans. David knows me well. I say things like, "Just another day or so" or "I'll just get to Maryland first" or "What about meeting in Richmond, that's half-way". But the fact is, I'm going to keep my promise. I'm going to do the right thing. I won't stay out on the road, sleeping outside alone, going through "bad" parts of town without anyone around if I need them, or putting myself in harms way to get to Florida. Do I want to just keep going? Well, yes, of course I do! But the risk and danger is not worth seeing the Route 1 End sign in Key West. I need to be responsible, yet I'm devastated. This is what I love to do.
In my sadness, I tell myself this:
Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.
I'll enjoy every minute I have left , as I go through Connecticut. Every step. I'm going to Groton tomorrow. Clinton, CT the next day. And so is John. For now. Milford, CT is after that, and then I think that may be it. Crossing NY and New Jersey on my own is probably not wise. And then, I'll go back home where I'm safe. I'll most likely fly out of New York, and more details are to be ironed out as the week unfolds. And John is making his own arrangements. I'm so sorry he does not feel well, and know this has been very hard on him.
I never could have predicted this. Yet, I'll never forget this time I've had in the gorgeous New England area. I'm not done.....as it will take a few more days to tie this up with a pretty bow, and not cry about it. I'm grateful for these days, the people, the places and all the support you all have given me. It has fueled my soul, and I just can't thank you enough for standing by me. And being here with me.
I'll awaken in this awesome campground tomorrow morning, and set out for another day on the road. I'll take these next few days I've been given, and make the most of them. Thanks for understanding and being there for me. Please say prayer for John, to feel better soon.
It's going to be okay,
Cyndi
Fast forward to this crossing: I made that same commitment and promise to my family, and pinkie swore, to really stay with my running partner this time. Really, I will! If he stays back, I stay back as well. John and I will set our own pace during the day, but our nightly destinations will be the same. Every night, I guaranteed. Just once so far in these 20 days, John stopped before our arranged destination, due to not feeling well. But we did sync up the next day. I kept to my commitment and promise to be as safe as possible. And having someone else there, esp at night and early morning is vital to what the plan was going to be in order for my family to be "all in" for this crossing. I had my mind-right. I was prepared, and I felt this was a fair request, and something I could do to keep everyone feeling 'okay' about me living on the road.
Yesterday, Day 19: John is still not feeling well. He's having physical/health issues, that won't allow him to be successful on a daily basis as he wishes to be. In order to respect his privacy (he is a private person when it comes to his health) I can tell you that he's been struggling with his ability to perform the miles as he desires to, and/or is able to. He told me yesterday he's going to stop this crossing. I choose not to blog about it at that time, as I had continued discussions with him, as well as tried to sort out my own feelings about what this means for me, as well. John feels certain I will have no problem finishing. But that's not the issue. The physical portion of these miles is not a issue for me, fortunately. BUT, safety is. I made a promise. I made a commitment to my family, ahead of time, to not do this alone. That John and I will be near and/or together daily. Now, he's leaving. When, you ask? In the next 4-6 days approximately. He desires to get to a bus station for his transportation.
What now? Good question! David just about hopped a plane to come fetch me. But, we have agreed that I will continue this week, until I know John's final bus plans. David knows me well. I say things like, "Just another day or so" or "I'll just get to Maryland first" or "What about meeting in Richmond, that's half-way". But the fact is, I'm going to keep my promise. I'm going to do the right thing. I won't stay out on the road, sleeping outside alone, going through "bad" parts of town without anyone around if I need them, or putting myself in harms way to get to Florida. Do I want to just keep going? Well, yes, of course I do! But the risk and danger is not worth seeing the Route 1 End sign in Key West. I need to be responsible, yet I'm devastated. This is what I love to do.
In my sadness, I tell myself this:
Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.
I'll enjoy every minute I have left , as I go through Connecticut. Every step. I'm going to Groton tomorrow. Clinton, CT the next day. And so is John. For now. Milford, CT is after that, and then I think that may be it. Crossing NY and New Jersey on my own is probably not wise. And then, I'll go back home where I'm safe. I'll most likely fly out of New York, and more details are to be ironed out as the week unfolds. And John is making his own arrangements. I'm so sorry he does not feel well, and know this has been very hard on him.
I never could have predicted this. Yet, I'll never forget this time I've had in the gorgeous New England area. I'm not done.....as it will take a few more days to tie this up with a pretty bow, and not cry about it. I'm grateful for these days, the people, the places and all the support you all have given me. It has fueled my soul, and I just can't thank you enough for standing by me. And being here with me.
I'll awaken in this awesome campground tomorrow morning, and set out for another day on the road. I'll take these next few days I've been given, and make the most of them. Thanks for understanding and being there for me. Please say prayer for John, to feel better soon.
It's going to be okay,
Cyndi
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