Allow Me To Reintroduce Myself

 

Since I could not decide on which intro I wanted to use today, I'm just going to use them all.....

Hi-lo! I'm Cyndi. I've seen you here before. As you've probably noticed, my inner child is stuck at 12 years old (maybe 10 actually) and as you can clearly see, I'm living out my 12 year old life on a farm as I've dreamed of.

No, wait wait, this is more like it....

Hi, it's me. I'm the problem, it's me. I have this thing where I get older but just never wiser.  (I can't help but like Taylor Swift.) 

Hold up, how about I combine them.....

Hello there! Welcome back to your very own secret farm you keep online with this 12 year old girl taking care of it for you. Guess what!? I've got you some new farm animals because I have a problem. It's me, I'm the problem it's me. You see, I said in my head (and out loud) that I was not getting any more farm animals. JK and you knew that. 

Nice A$$

So how did this donkey thing start, you ask?

Cue dream sequence music. So I was talking to Karla, and then to Rebecca at the Horse and Donkey Rescue in Celina (you know the one by Brookshires) and was going to take on 2 special needs rescue donkeys. The problem was that these 2 sweet donkeys were alternating reoccurring issues with their feet/infections/abscess and without getting them under control, they could not be released for adoption nor load on a trailer. And since the 2 donkeys that I was going to take are bonded, they would need to come together. And they are staying at a foster site due to their health issues. Fast forward to that not really working out in the short or long run. 

Instead though, I spoke to the lady in Oklahoma (who brought me Dora, my mini horse, many years ago) and talked to her about a couple of donkeys she had taken in from an auction in Abilene - and ended up taking those instead. She said she was happy to make the delivery, too. And to back this train up, it was to be 1 donkey in the beginning, but I ended up taking 2 jennys because someone had "cancelled" on her regarding the delivery of the white donkey - and she was in the horse trailer already, so here you go.

I named her Poppy 🌺

Welcome, Pippa! 

Okay, 2 donkeys is fine, as that's what I need to do anyway because they are actually already bonded and need their bestie (they are herd animals) and 2 is a good manageable number. They came to me without names, and with the idea that the "brown one is probably 12 years old and the white one is probably 10 years old" and supposably with the possibility of being pregnant but she could not be sure of it. She simply gave me a quick warning before she jumped in her truck to leave. "Oh yeah, they might have been exposed to a jack (male donkey) at the end of last summer is what I have been told". Great. Bye! 

They are always together. 💕

So these 2 love bugs are truly sweet and kind mini donkeys. They are all up in my business. They want pets, treats and love please. 

Probably should have named her Eeyore as that's how she sees
the world. Slow, postures as such, and not a care and in no hurry.

Esp Poppy, as she's always accepting of love and attention. Treats are good, but love is better.  She allows me to brush her and groom her without a halter. And by the way, they are easily haltered which is great for not only grooming, but also to have their feet did. And also, it's wonderful that they are easy to catch, small donkeys, and extremely trusting. They do each have some skin issues I'll need to focus on, but so did Hope when I got her years ago. Poppy has owies on the lower parts of her legs which I immediately placed ointment along with wound spray on to keep the flies off (flies make everything worse). And Pippa has a couple of places where her hair is missing (under right eye and at her right shoulder). She also has some lower leg fly strike places, but hers seem better off than Poppy's. Nonetheless, I'll get them squared away. A good diet will help them as well. 

Are they pregnant? Not really sure. I asked google and she said donkey gestation is around 12-13 months, so I'll know for sure around the end of this summer. Whatever that means. End of summer?

I'm not sure where I got the names Poppy and Pippa from, but those are the names that popped in my head and I've just decided that that will be their names. Easy peasy. No need to overthink it these days. And I love it that these 2 jennys are so tame, sweet and gentle. Who knew? And they love love the barn very much. I don't keep them with my mini horses right now although they were all introduced and everyone liked everyone. Very nice.

But instead, I have them in the front pasture with access to the barn there for shelter. I really want them to eat and graze as they both came to me underweight (Poppy more so than Pippa). Pippa has gained weight nicely, but Poppy still is too thin, so I'm trying to see about getting her to gain some weight. Pippa could just be pregnant. Who knows around here. Maybe the pigs are pregnant (Wilbur you silly boy) and maybe the donkeys are pregnant. So things could get exciting or things could stay calm. I do happen to like calm. But we all know baby farm animals are so darn stinkin cute. Like I have a say in any of this anyway.

I often find them resting their head on the other, with eyes closed.
Or standing so close, they touch. Love these girls. 

These two. How did I get this blessed? I could NOT have
asked for more sweeter donkeys. 

Feeding the tank

It happened. I had a new septic system put in - and if that's the last time that happens in my lifetime - I'll be just fine with that. It was not awful or anything like that. It's just that it takes huge construction equipment like a crane truck to lower all-the-things like the concrete tank into a huge (and I mean huge) hole in the ground. And an excavator came to dig this huge ginormous hole. And you know people don't care about other people's things. In my case, my pasture. I did beg them to try and not tear up my land putting this septic system because these large construction vehicles had to go through 3 gates to go down and around and back up to the area where it was to be placed underground (next to the old one which had to be crushed underground which required another piece of heavy equipment.) I can tell you the willy nilly of the farm animals getting out of their particular pasture areas was the least of my worries. I was mostly worried they might fall into the crater of a hole though. It was at least 12 ft deep and longer than 2 cars. I was scared of that hole. 

I took this pic at night, so it's hard to get a handle on the size.
Trust me on this one.

You see, they left that hole there overnight and the next day they would "drop the tank". I can imagine in the dark that that's a long way to fall esp when you don't see it coming. ie livestock guard dogs, sheep, etc. I did my best to manage the animals, but I can tell you there's only so much you can manage with roaming animals. 

And after it was all said and done, the dirt around it all is like quick sand when it's wet and I may or may not have almost lost my life figuring this out. Why? Because merely days after the install, the septic system started alarming. I've never heard an alarm so loud. It was a Tuesday morning and I was home (as Tuesdays are my day off) and I was excited to be able to do laundry now. But no, the septic system light and sound goes off full speed ahead. I call my septic guy. No answer only VM. I text him. Help please. Nothing.

So I unknowingly walk (like an idiot) through and seemingly over/on that new wet dirt to do some trouble-shooting myself (it had rained all night unfortunately) to check the pipe that holds the liquid chlorine (which is my job to keep full) and that's when I sank and understood how quick sand works and how people die in it. Holy Jesus. This is not packed dirt no it's not. It's dirt that needs to settle over time and going into it wet is not a good idea. I thought about an animal getting stuck in it and how would I pull them out? Frick. Call the septic guy again. Nothing. Geeezzz.

Okay, so now I can't use the water until I know what's going on. It wasn't until early afternoon that I heard from my septic guy and he would come that evening to check it all out.

Luckily, the sheep are staying away from this trap
I’ve seemingly accidentally set. 

Fast forward, they can't get to what they need to either because of the wet dirt/sinking issue without using boards to walk across to where they needed to get. And they will also need to bring a digger (more heavy equipment?) in maybe, too. OMGoodness. Luckily, a short term temporary fix was implemented by him and "when it dries out enough" they will be back to make the changes/repairs needed to correct the root problem. It's raining like cats and dogs and sheep and goats as I write this. It's gonna be a minute before this will be truly rectified. We can use water which is a plus in it all. And did I mention I'd like this to be my last septic system I ever have? We'll see though. If I ever move.....there will likely be a septic involved. We never know what the future will bring. That's the only thing I know for sure. Wait, I do know that feeding the tank (flushing the toilet) is good for the septic system if the septic system is healthy. I do know that I should be feeding the tank. 

Bee knowing

Dear God,

Why does beekeeping have to bee so hard?

Amen. 

Y'all. It's no joke. I went to Bee Class at The Bee Supply in Blue Ridge (which is where everyone goes apparently) and whew, that was a bee-ting. From 9 am - 4 pm we talked bees. We touched bees. We looked in bee boxes/frames and hunted for the queen. We learned ALL things bees including bee precautions, bee predators, bee management, bee feeding, bee checking, bee everything. My brain hurt when I left that day. Seriously, I had no idea. The only thing I knew about bees prior to the class was:

1) I have the equipment (bee boxes/frames and the things that go in the bee boxes) and not the bees. 

2) Not sure if I'll get the bees.

3) I have to get the bees for a possible ag exemption

4) Bees are a part time job (wait, I learned that in class)

5) From the people I know who have ever tried and had bees, only 1 person still has their bees and even he has killed/lost his bees multiple times and keeps buying more. That's the only reason he has bees is because he keeps buying more. 

Now though, I know that bees are not easy and I may change my mind about that - with time. We'll see. 

And now I also know about beekeeping and even have people who will help me with my beekeeping (thank you, The Bee Supply). But wow, during class, once I had my bee suit on and was pulling out those frames (from the bee box/hive) with thousands of bees on them and the angry buzzing all around me, every muscle in my body was tense and I was sore the next day like I had worked out every muscle in my body. Being in the midst of that many bees was shocking. Now I know why other people's bees don't make it. It's because people don't want to do the things to maintain the bees because it's work, you get stung, and it's not fun (yet).

Yet ironically I watched the people who work there love this bee process. Their labor of love for the bees was inspiring and they truly love beekeeping. So maybe it can be fun to have bees and be a beekeeper. I'm working up to it mentally. I need to order a hive/queen (actual bees) to start the process and give it a try, but can't bring myself to hit the add to cart button much less the check out button. I mean, I'd rather go run across the US again before I bee-keep. Or stick a sharp stick in my eye. Or anything difficult or strenuous. #amIscaredofbees?

Can't the drones that watch over the land for Grayson County Ag Dept just see my bee boxes and assume I have bees? Can they really see if there's live bees in there? And y'all, you can't mow or weed eat around them. It angers the bees. Will I have to mow in my bee suit? So many concerns and questions. To be continued. 

Yes, Grayson County Ag Dept, there's bees in here 😉

Speaking of fun

Maybe with time, beekeeping will be fun and enjoyable. I'll keep you posted. But what was fun was taking Brooks to the Dallas Zoo this past Tuesday on my day off. I'll call it Brooks Cannon's Day Off. 

Brooks did not go to school that day and instead went to the zoo with myself where we meet my friend Gina, and her 4 year old granddaughter, Lana. So. Much. Fun.

This is not the Dallas Zoo we all knew growing up. This is now a real zoo. 

He was excited to see the whole
elephant family (including the baby)

The reptile building might have been his fav

Feeding the birds was fun, too

We saw lions and tiger and bears. And so many animals I've never heard of or ever seen. It's like going to DisneyWorld, as you need more than one day to do all the things there are to do there. 

The carousel is always a big hit 🎠

This water play area was truly amazing, and
bringing a change of clothes is advised.

I could go on and on, but for those of you who have been to The Dallas Zoo recently, know what I mean. It's the real zoo deal. No, they did not have bees there. 

Needless to say, he was much more excited about the snake than Lana was. 

And just like Ferris Bueller once said, "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." 

It made me wonder all the many things I'm missing that are super cool, esp for kids. I should get out more often and see. We should have more Brooks Cannon's Day Off moments. 

Alrighty, in closing, I want to tell you I did a thing. 

Hope I can figure this out when I need it

I've been asked if I have this (a generator) before, and have actually needed this before, but have never invested in it and by the way, I can not imagine ever getting the benefit from it for what it costs to do this, but I did it anyway because I could because that's my business (thank you Tabitha Brown).

So I had a generator installed that pipes into a new transformer fuse box that transforms a certain number of fuses in the house to continue working when the power goes out, using this tri-powered generator. It starts with a push button remote. It runs on gas, or diesel, or propane. I don't know if the fuses (refrigerator, etc) I picked are going to be exactly what I want when the power goes out - or the world ends - whichever comes first. But I hope I remember the steps to turn it all on when that time comes. 

And I also want to tell you that the electrician that did this work for me is a sweet man by the name of Richard. He also works on my mowers and keeps them in great shape and running so I can mow my pastures. He also works on cars and helped me when my truck would not start (and the hood would not open, which he also fixed). This man is amazing and I hope God has a special place for him and people like him. He's 83 and still going strong. I call him Richard, but really he's my pawpaw. He's like a grand-dad to me. I'm not sure how I got so lucky to have him in my life, but I must have done just-enough right, that I was gifted him in my life. Dear God, Thank you for Richard - and people like Richard, all over the world. Amen.

And although my blood cancer dictates that cancer warriors with PV have a average age of death as 77 years old with some dying younger and some getting to live a little longer, I may not be able to aspire to Be A Richard, but I can sure start trying now. 

Trying to try,

Cyndi

Me after the zoo. Wait, Brooks after the zoo. 

First Day of Spring

As Spring descends upon the farm, this beautiful weather brings friends and family to visit. As the cold and wet winter seems to naturally discourage folks from a farm visit, it's the warm sunshine and mild temperatures that coax people out of their homes and into the world. 

Sharing Is Caring

There's so many farm animals that really enjoy and love visitors. And who also seem to enjoy being in community with one another. 

The Odd Couple always loves some love and pets.

* And as a side note: Wilbur's surgery went wonderfully and he's all healed up from his recent neutering. He's a little love bug, for sure.

The Goat and Pig Pen has been a big hit and the sharing of this space has been a luxury for us all. First, it allows both the pigs and goats to roam somewhat freely while having both safe and dry separate sleeping spaces, and the best reason of all.......this situationship remains an easy and effective way to control the weight of 2 types of farm animals that love to eat too much (talking to you piggies and goaties). It's unfortunate, but both goats (and sheep) can overeat to a dangerous point. And pigs can get too huge from overeating. So over all, the sharing of this space has been a blessing for us all. And my truly favorite part about it is that the goats (yes you, CoCo) can no longer terrorize the Tack Room's feed supplies. It just makes all our lives so much easier. Wait, let me continue though. With these 5 sweeties communing together, just feeding Maggie, Wilbur, Baby, CoCo and Pearl is so much simpler - as is true for keeping their water(s) stocked and filled easily. And as much as I want them to roam the pastures freely, it's just not practical nor seemingly the right thing to do - at least at this time. Plus, the fact that none of them can eat the chicken food has drastically decreased the amount of chicken feed I now buy. Cha Ching.

You're the prettiest girl, Pearl

Loco CoCo

Farm Boy

It's true, Brooks is a big fan of a rescue vehicle. A construction vehicle. And quite frankly, most any vehicle. He's had his construction site setup in the barn for awhile now and used it regularly.

Initial construction site in barn

Yet, now the construction site has moved
outside the barn to a muddier venue. 

Nevermind the huge turkey lurking.

There's no doubt that Brooks loves a wet and muddy construction site to play with his construction trucks. 

But I wanted to take a minute to talk about the farm side of him. This 3 year old has the capacity to go to the barn and feed all the animals appropriately, fill the waters and understands the inner workings of who-needs-what in the barn. He collects eggs with steady and soft hands, laying them gently in the egg basket. And is an expert raker of cleaning the barn floor almost like it's an instinctual process born genetically inside him. I often tell Lauren, when I step off the curb, just ask Brooks what to do with all the farm animals. He'll know. 

Cool, a baby snake

"Can I tear it open and look at the inside?"

This boy. When he came upon a baby snake (recently deceased) he's quick to not only pick it up but also to decide what next to do with it. After a discussion of options, he made the final decision to throw it to the chickens and let them eat it. And he did just that. As soon as he threw that snake in the middle of a chicken group, it was merely seconds before the chickens had torn it up and eaten it completely. As Brooks watched, I thought about all the therapy I'll be paying for when he's older. Certainly this will scar him. But no. He watched, and then turned and said, okay, let's go rake in the barn now. And he never looked back. He just thought it was really cool. Maybe I won't be paying for therapy. At least not for him anyway. 

And then, we have the opportunity for some cow-time now and again as we sometimes get to feed the neighbors cows which he loves and is far too comfortable doing. Yet, we learn fun facts from Farmer Ed like the fact that cows have no upper teeth. 

Not bothered one bit that their head is 
as big as most of him.

We do practice cow safety.
As he knows no fear until we
instill it into him. 

Ed and Gina are our sweet friends that own the land (west) next door which is pasture land for their cows. And sometimes, when Ed gets the tractor out, Brooks is the recipient of a tractor ride. 

Never enough farming to be had

Our little farm boy is merely a portion of who this sweet boy really is. To give you an idea of who Brooks is, let me share with you a picture from his school. Can you guess which is Brooks?

Yep, that's my boy

Happy to say

I'm happy to report that overall, everyone on the farm is doing well including our farm boy. And little sister, Olive is growing by leaps and bounds and turns 9 months old soon. 

Yes, Charlotte is still as wild and crazy as usual.

Love my broken pups ❣

Yet her and Sugar are forming a slow bonding process, mostly in the car seat.

We have some new neighbors on the east side.........

The most beautiful cows 

I couldn't ask for a more picturesque cow

The chickens are laying more eggs now than I've ever had happen on the daily.

Don't be a Pecky Becky

My cancer treatments are getting back on track. Work is going great. Everyone in the house is working except for the tiny human beans. I'm dreaming of what a house with just me inside might look like. Being independently owned and operated as my current status feels like a boss. Granted, this newfound change in my relationship status does not come without grief and I won't kid myself otherwise. As I've learned grieving is part of this journey I'm on - and I shall honor it as such. I walk with it, I cry with it and it's un-fightable. The more I allow myself to feel every feeling I have, the more healing takes place. For me, grief is :

love with no where to go anymore 💔

And as I take in all my happiness and abundance of joy, I also embrace the elements of the hard feelings as well. Nobody ever said it'd be easy. Everything I've wanted is sitting on the other side of fear. And we all know fear is a liar. So as I'm strapped in on a rollercoaster I hand-picked myself, I'm doing both hands-in-the-air-like-you-just-don't-care and also at times, hanging on tight with white knuckles. Fortunately, I am surrounded by love, light and peace and a seatbelt of determination. And as Brooke said it best: Protect your peace at all costs. I think about that Brooke...... All. The. Time.  

And with all this goodness around us, we are blessed to have Easter coming up - and family over. And kiddos who will be hunting for Easter eggs and real eggs. And sharing our stories of life and love with each other. It's one of my favorite things to do. 

Little Lolo back in the day 🥰
Happy Easter to you and your family!

Be cool being you,

Cyndi 

Unstoppable

 

The farm doesn’t ever really stop and I prefer life like that. Go Man Go. Although we all have a hard-stop for sleep (well, except for the livestock guard dogs) as sleep brings restoration for our bodies to get up and Go Man Go another fabulous day. I am privileged to watch daily as the farm animals are unstoppable in all they do. 

Wiley Wilbur 

Wilbur is living his best life with his 2 sister wives, Maggie and Baby. 

Baby doesn’t seem like Wilbur’s type,
but they have come to enjoy each other. 
Baby is not for everyone. She's
definitely one of a kind, and since she's
an older girl, she enjoys her own quiet time.

Wilbur and Maggie are still a couple, as you know they moved in with each other immediately upon meeting. Yet now, Baby is in the friend zone and all three piggies have settled into a nice, happy life together. I like to think of them as The Odd Throuple. 

And I can’t deny that there could be piglets in our future. I’m hoping NOT. But Wilbur has been a busy guy getting his rizz on with Maggie. And I’ve seen him wink at Baby if you know what I mean. 

No need to worry though. He’s scheduled to go to the vet to be neutered on Tuesday.

And that's exactly what happened. Wilbur was easy to catch as he loves people, esp those who give him pets and treats. He's gained a few pounds since moving to the farm. I digress. Wilbur was easily caught and placed in a cage just for him and off to the vet we would go. But first, what I wasn't expecting is for his stress level to be so high about it all. He pooped everything he had inside that little pig belly of his once he was caged and placed in the truck. The bed of the truck would need a serious clean-out once this day was done.

I felt bad about it all because I thought maybe Wilbur would think he's leaving the farm for good. When in actuality, he's having surgery (being neutered) so that he can stay here forever. I tried to comfort him and tell him that, but he was still unsure. 

We made it to the vet and funny thing was, I was the only one in the waiting room with a piggie. Lots of cats and dogs there, as it was a surgery day for the vet. The good news for Wilbur was all the attention he received while we waited in The Waiting Room for check-in. He's a friendly guy. And I hated leaving him there, but I would be back to pick him up later that same day.

And sure enough, I received the call from the vet to come get him that afternoon and that surgery went well. The vet also told me to consider keeping him separate for a few days, so I had prepared a special area for Wilbur with a soft bed, food, water and hay. But once we arrived back home and got to the barn, Wilbur wanted nothing to do with his new special space. He just wanted to get back to Maggie and his usual living area. I tried several times to get him to stay in his safe place, but no, he wanted only to get back to his usual pen with Maggie. I gave up trying to keep him confined and allowed him to go back to Maggie. And as soon as I opened the door to the Goat and Pig pen, Wilbur literally ran in there and went straight to (he and Maggie's) pig house and snuggled and settled in the straw. He was so glad to be home.

The sweet thing was how Maggie stood guard at the pig house opening to make sure the goats did not bother Wilbur. Coco and Pearl are curious and kind goats who wanted to see - and smell Wilbur, as they knew something was different. But Maggie kept them away and allowed Wilbur to feel safe and rest. 

These two  🤪    Coco and Pearl
(The goat houses have been a big hit)

As you probably know, Maggie and Wilbur bonded so quickly early on, and their love is a fascinating example of how animals come to the farm and are just "meant to be" here. They are certainly 'meant to be' and I'm so happy for them to have each other. And to be a witness to the personalities, the love, the realness, and the true living beings that these farm animals are. They are just like you and me - trying to enjoy life, eat well, feel safe and find love and connection.

Happy to be back together 💕

For now, this is their happily-ever-after. Everyone is back together. Wilbur is healing. The weather looks to keep getting nicer and nicer. Life is good on The Graves Farm. We are, after all, unstoppable.

**As a side note: one of the most common questions I've gotten since my divorce recently is this:

Did you keep your last name Graves?

The answer is yes. It's still The Graves Farm. I'm still Cyndi Graves. ✌

  

LoLo The Librarian

Someone else who is unstoppable is my little big girl, LoLo. When Lauren was young, she was our little LoLo. And as a young LoLo she would say she was going to be a librarian when she grew up. And when I would ask her why a librarian? She would say because it's safe and quiet in a library. She's always been a lover of books and enjoyed the solitude and silence of a library. 

And sure enough, that's exactly what she did in her life. She's not only a librarian herself, but she also married one. And now, she's back at work doing just that. This time, being a librarian at The Sherman Public Library. Congrats, Lolo! I'm so happy for you. As little Olive turns 8 months old, you're heading back to the work force and I know this is hard. It's a double edged sword. Wonderful and horrible. Easy and hard. All at the same time. This has been quite a transition for the Cannon Fam: moving to Gunter, finding jobs, and dripping with children is not an easy task to always manage. But you guys are rocking it. Sherman is lucky to have you. You my dear, are unstoppable. 

Our Little LoLo

Always a reader 📚

Are you old enough to have kids?

Let's talk cancer, shall we

Cancer can also be unstoppable, although not everyone's is, mine does happen to fall under the unfortunate category of unstoppable. I typically consider unstoppable as a positive and empowering word. I love the song, thank you Sia. I love the idea of being unstoppable. Yet, putting the word cancer in the same sentence with unstoppable is not as inviting. 

As most of you know, the blood cancer I have, polycythemia vera is unstoppable. My most recent update comes on the heels of the insurance appeal of my cancer treatment, Besremi. While my insurance company did approve the appeal for my cancer treatment, it turns out the caveat for the approval was that the insurance company would only pay for a portion of the treatment - not all of it. 

The remaining amount that would be my responsibility would not be do-able for me (it would be similar to having another mortgage payment every month) and that's when Texas Oncology stepped in and started looking for assistance for me. And that they did - and were successful in securing my cancer treatment (Besremi) for me for which I am most grateful. I was able to move forward with my cancer treatment later in Feb after a long fight for it, but the couple of months without treatment did not fair well for my body. 

After labs were run in January, it was found that my (what I'll call) my blood numbers (WBC, RBC, Platelets, etc etc) were all askew. At this point, I had been close to 2 months without cancer treatment, thank you insurance company. Then, my oncologist informed me that I would need another type of infusion to help improve the integrity of my blood due to my lack of treatment recently, thank you insurance company. By the insurance company dragging their heels and not willing to cover my cancer treatment(s), now they will be met with another expense of a different treatment that I now need in addition. It's all so sad, this insurance company BS. And I can assure you, I am by and far not the only cancer patient experiencing this madness. 

You see, for human beings, healthy blood is everything. And mine is not, and this affects the soft tissue(s) in my body, my organs, my bones and my general health. So for the next 5 weeks, I am to go to the Infusion Room for a weekly (different) infusion to help boost and improve the quality of my blood. 

This whole process of having polycythemia vera is like a dog chasing it's tail. It never comes full circle and ends. It just keeps going around and around. Your body needs iron, iron creates blood, PV patients already have "too much sticky and unhealthy" blood due to the cancerous process inside your bone marrow, then to have blood taken from your body with phlebotomy, then have cancer treatment, then iron decreases and blood values get wonky and your blood becomes volatile, then you need iron, but iron is bad and good for you all at the same time, etc etc. It's a vicious circle. I'm hoping once I get past this newest weekly infusion(s) and back on my cancer treatments that things will settle down. We'll see. Nothing is guaranteed as this is a progressive cancer. It's going to do what it's going to do. I'm just along for the ride. All I can do is try to try, to enjoy the ride. Trying, for me, seems like I'm taking it for granted and it's so easy, so instead I try to try when it comes to life and death things. Because in actuality, I have no control over any of this.  

I'm forever grateful to the nurses and staff in the infusion room at Texas Oncology in McKinney. They are there for all the cancer patients who walk through the door. MaryAnn, Carla and all the other wonderful nurses provide a sense of normalcy to what is not normal. I'm met with a hug every visit, sometimes even a group hug. And soft words that let me know they care. We chat about life and what is happening in their own lives. It's a place of safety and love for me. I can't imaging doing this without them. They sit in the dark with their cancer patients by saying words such as 'I'm sorry this is happening to you". And that's all that's needed in times such as these. Empathy and validation. 

Bee-ewe-tiful

It's BEE time 

Who doesn't want a agricultural exemption? We all would love that, esp for those who have land and farm animals. But that's not how the world works unfortunately. 

Instead, each county determines how and what qualifies as an ag exemption. When I first moved to Gunter almost 8 years ago now, I was told there was not an option for an ag exemption for me due to the amount (or lack of amount of land I have). And then, magically, I found out a way to work around it (from Grayson County) and was given information that I could start building my "5 year" ag history which is needed before you are granted an actual ag exemption. 

Now I am not the expert on this. And the man who currently determines this, in this particular dept in Sherman, who goes by Ag Daddy (true story) has informed me that I can get 6 bee hives and start building my ag history. And learn bee keeping. 

So time went by and this bee thing has fallen to the side while other things have been happening my little life. Until a man in Wolfe City blessed me with many bee things. And told me many bee-keeping things. Bless this nice guy. He, too is working to finish out a 5 year ag history and is a wealth of information for me. And I thank him very much.

This man not only loaded my truck completely full with multiple bee hives and bee castles that he happen to have 'extra' of......he is also a reminder of how innately good people can really be. Do you ever feel like someone falls into your little world and it's part of the universal plan? This chance meeting was just that. He needed me to take all this stuff away and it was exactly what I wanted and needed. Thank you, universe.

Sugar is never far away

So it was decided that 2 hives would go up on Ryan and Lauren's property and 4 hives would be in my back pasture close to the creek and under shade trees. This makes the 6 bee hives we need. But first, we will all attend a bee-keeping class. Then, get a bee suit and buy our bees. 

I wish I knew more about this thing called bee-keeping but I have a feeling it won't be too much longer before I inform you of how many times I've been stung by a bee in a single day....or hour....or minute. 

But I want to save $8500 a year, so what's a few bee stings. 

Just so you know, we can still be turned down for an ag exemption after attempting to build this ag history for 5 years, but I at least gotta try. And I don't mean try to try this time. I mean really try. 

So what did I do with some of the extra platforms and bee-hive tops? 

I used them for my goats playground. 
They can jump and play, as you know goats like
to hop up on all things higher than where they are.

Of course Curious Coco is the first to inspect

How's Paul?

In complete seriousness, this is the MOST common question I get about the farm. How's Paul The Turkey doing? Does he like the cold? Is he feeling okay? So I wanted to let you know that Paul is doing awesome. He's truly the best turkey ever. EVER. Love you, big guy. Never leave me.

I rarely show Paul with his feathers down,
and he's just as handsome.

And I recently caught Paul dust bathing in the garden beds......

Silly boy.
But it is a great idea.
He needs a large space for his dust bathing.

Paul on his (saw horse from Home Depot) roost.
Mirror behind him for admiration time.
It's like his own Man Cave, but a Turkey Cave.

Couldn't resist a front photo, too 💟
His feet are tucked under him as 
he readys himself for beddie bye. He's a 
show-off til the last minute of the day.

This is new 

Sometimes new changes occur and I have no idea why. They just happen. Oddly, the 4 livestock guard dogs, Penny, Dutch, Levi and Whisper have taken to enjoying afternoon time in the intersanctum (front yard area). In the past, this has not been a place they frequented. Yet nowadays, they are readily resting and relaxing in places that were once not a thought for them. Apparently, they think about it often now.

I'm pretty sure the hot tub does not need guarding

5 out of my 7 dogs
all enjoying the afternoon.
Char is unsure why they are
camping out here.

And every now and again, I place a dog bed outside for The Littles to sun on. 

120 lbs is not meant for this dog bed.

All 4 LGD's are always back in the pasture and roaming the parameter to guard the farm animals each and every night. Yet recently (sometimes and not every day) they chose to rest close to the house after a long night of guarding. I think it's a fair trade-off.  

The only true downfall of this is when visitors come over and are not used to them being around so close. Some people are genuinely scared of such large dogs and I get it. Luckily, all it takes is a few treats to get them back in their pasture. 

I actually enjoy them being close by. And love that they are here to scare off critters and folks that do not need to be here. That's not all bad. I feel safe with them around. 

Char Char

I'm waiting for the day I can update you that Charlotte is calming herself down around people she does not know. But no. Turns out, she's unstoppable too. She's still a barking maniac with new people. But I'm working on trying to socialize her and have several people that are new-to-her that tolerate her wild barking and talk soft and calm to her to let her know everything is okay. This is going to take time. She's apparently been through some things of which I'll never know. I just love her as she is, and she's become part of the pack. And the interesting thing is, she's perfectly fine and a regular dog inside the house when it's just us. You'd never know she had a wild side. 

She always loves a car ride.
But going through a drive thru with her
reminds me of being in crazy town

Sugar tries to show her fun things 

But her very favoritest thing to do?

Queen of the Mower
Always on the mower in her princess place.
and.....

Long runs and walks in the cart (stroller)
This is truly her happy place.
Me too girl, me too 💛

And I won't lie. Sometimes her crazy barking at people when I'm out on a run or walk with her keeps people far away from me. It's not a bad thing. I never knew a little dog could be such a people-repellent.

And now, it's time for some me-time. Which will be short and sweet as my soul settles. 🙏

Dear Cyndi,

Sometimes life is so good it doesn't make sense. You have picked inner peace over keeping the peace. "Peace" kept at your own expense is.not.peace. Remain unstoppable, sweet pea. Just keep trying to try. 

☮

Love, love and more love, 

Cyndi

Me each day I wake up.....

 

and I did get to take Brooks to his swim lesson 😉