Big love in a little house

Thank you, Lauren for this most appropriate gift

I've arrived

I have many favorite parts of life. Like my little house. Since it's larger than a "tiny" house, I do tend to call it my little house - and honestly, it's just the right size for me and my crew. By 'crew', I mean the dogs and I - and Pixie, of course.

I think my very favorite part of it is the 'less cleaning' aspect. I would rather be outside loving on my farm animals than inside cleaning. In fact, given the choice, I would happily clean the barn instead of cleaning my house. And yes, some of that lends to the fact that I just love being outside in general. Ideally, in the barn. 

Recently, Lauren and Ryan graciously gifted me a vacuum/mop Roomba - without even knowing my disdain for floor cleaning. Her name is Honey Bee. I love her.

My girl

She lives up to her name. I love how diligently she cleans and mops, going about her business quietly, like the busy bee she is. When I watch her, I feel as though she is actually thinking as she maneuvers around as if she's being considerate. She's never rude. She doesn't complain. She moves around the room in harmony with us. Almost like she's sentient. Sometimes, I watch her busy bee self just working away and I'm convinced she's breathing and I think, Honey Bee is real.

I mean, she can read the room. Frankly, some people can't do that.

Pixie Pie is still trying to figure out who this new friend is. She's not opposed to her. Just needs more time with her. 

I'm in love with my little house as it fits my life purrfectly, and I do think my housemates would agree. I do have the self-awareness to notice those who visit may not relate to it in the same way as I do. And I'm okay with that. Little spaces are not for everyone. I'm very grateful to have found my way in life to it. I've craved a life of less is more - and the combination of coziness, the feeling of safety, and the growing of big love in a little house feels absolutely luxurious. 

Love you to the barn and back

Another wonderful and favorite part of my life is The Barn. Of course. 

This is where many of those I love the most, live and reside. 

Poppy and Pippa in the mix - always

Poppy and Pippa have renewed their vows since Emmie went to live down the street with Kevin and Crystal. BTW - Emmie is doing remarkably well! Her new farm is just a mile or two away, and when I pass it, I see her lil self living her best donkey life. 

Together Forever 

Poppy and Pippa are both older donkeys, with Poppy being around 30 years old. I love that they get to live their senior lives here at the aka Sunshine Senior Resort with an abundance of safety, love, food  - and no shortage of opinions. Although there are no spa robes nor cucumber water, they do get to poop wherever they want.

Hope is looking good and is the young one of the group. She allows (code for tolerates) me the pleasure of cutting her mane and styling it to stay fresh and clean. Well, she tries to try. I can be a lot for her. 

Don’t worry, Hope, karma 
will find those people who hurt you long ago. 

And my girl, Dora ❤️

With age, Dora (also around 30 now) has developed a slow and meticulous walking style. 

No hurry to go anywhere 

How are you this cute?!🥰 

Dora does not rush. She has places to go, but apparently none of them require urgency. The last time my farrier was here trimming hooves, he gently mentioned that I might want to research burial options for my older girls. Rude, but fair. So I did, as it is in everyone’s best interest to be prepared in a time of need. After all, part of farm ownership is cemetery logistics. And, I do have a cemetery onsite and absolutely plan for all my girls to stay with me here on the land they called home. And as morbid as this sounds, I'm officially saying that after I step off the curb, please turn me into dust and spread me back to the earth - right here in/on my very own cemetery. There's no where else I'd rather be.

Visiting recently

Brooks and I went to visit Kitty-pillar recently. She was a stray cat who passed away, and I had buried her under the trees to rest easy there. I do have to be diligent to keep the gravesites covered so predators do not dig them up. Just part of country life. 

Her smile

I can’t even with her cute smile 

Food? Did someone say food?

And my sweet sweet curious goats are my secret loves who I don't always speak of readily. But they are always there. Always watching. And, almost always, eating. Coco and Pearl are such fun lil girls that they do indeed make me want more goats which is how this whole farm animal situation gets out of control. You love one animal. Then you think, Well, surely one more won't hurt. And then you have 100 chickens. I digress.

Where was I......oh yeah, I do love them so much. Coco nuzzles me, licks my hand tasting the saltiness of it, while I rub her little face - all while Pearl prefers to enjoy the view from just out-of-reach. Pearl and Hope have a similar holla hoop - just out of reach - but close enough to enjoy. Not touching please. Look only. 

Sisters not sisters

They love to play house, jump on anything,
and coexist with the chickens extremely well

Since Coco and Pearl are such BFFs, I won't throw a wrench in things at the moment. Yes, I want more goats but I also know that all is right-sized in the barn. So walk away, Cyndi, walk away from the Craigslist Goats For Sale page. 

Me, making my list of fun goat names
for 'when it's time'

Chicken Mama

And as you know - my chickens were my first farm-animal-wish-come-true. They were my gateway animal. I got chickens and apparently my brain said, Well, now that we've done that, let's collect the entire barnyard. And here we are.

I am such a chicken mama and proud of it. Who else can sleep and poop all at the same time. I’m talking about the chickens. 

My boy and my girlz 

My favorite thing about chickens?

I love the way they have community within their flock. They have best friends, and are fiercely loyal to those said friends til the end of their days. They will lay beside one another for days, as emotional support for their elderly friend(s) as they move across the rainbow bridge. Utterly inspiring. 

Not often thought about by humans, yet each chicken has their own little personality. They have their social hierarchies just as humans do, and likely, their own neighborhood gossip. They create community amongst themselves and invite other hens into their flock with love and (mostly) respect. Everyone has a place. The pecking order is real.

Summer will end soon, I promise

For me, I know each cluck and what it means. I know who is happy, who is distressed - and who is complaining. They are able to make announcements to the group - whether it's a happy egg song or a warning call to the others. They are truly fascinating creatures - like little dinosaurs. 

Yes, I am The Treat Lady

I appreciate them all - and they work hard every day making eggs inside their little bodies, only to wake up and do it again the next day. A daily miracle, right here at Peace and Love Acres. 

And we can't ever forget Paul The Turkey. 

Oh, my handsome Paul. He's so dedicated, loyal - and a bit of a bragger. He does look good, and checks hisself in the mirror every day. 

As he ages, he is slower in his strut. 
Me too, Paul. Me, too.

But wow, how did I get so lucky to get a kind, sweet male turkey - because they are all not that way - search it up. 

A rare find when his feathers are down
But he is in molt

I know it’s hot sweet pea
It’ll get better soon

And to add to the heat, Paul is in molt, and that takes a toll on chickens and turkeys. Once he sheds his feathers and grows them back - he'll be lookin fly again. Keep doing you, Paul. Keep showin' up and showin' out. It's you and me, bud, still walking around like we own the place, looking a little rough. 

Snow Day 

It's been a long road for this young stray, yet Snowy is showing us how to walk it out. 

Let's review. It all started when a stray Great Pyrenees was hanging around Lauren and Ryan's house a few weeks before they were to move to Wolfe City. And they had become attached enough to this sweet stray that they asked if we could have him here in Wolfe City. The pup was caught by a helpful neighbor, who then transported him to me (half way, thank you kind neighbor!) and I took possession of him. The kids named him Snowy because of his beautiful white coat. 

He’s definitely learned to relax

Little did we know what would come of all this, but after a vet visit, a neuter, and also addt medications, his ailments resolved. The only thing the vet was not able to resolve was Snowy's obsession with chewing things. Anything. Everything. 

This stuffie happens to be an approved chew toy
A rare occurrence 

I'm hoping with time and age, Snowy will stop the incessant chewing of anything in his reach. Granted, I have 1001 bones around this place for him to chew. But no, a shoe or boot is much better. At least it's not chickens he's after! Let's focus on the victories. 

In a turn of events, Mia and Snowy have become great friends who enjoy a rough game of play. Both prior strays.  Both full of love and light. 

The Dog Pack 

Ya know, I love a dog. All dogs. Any dogs. Big dogs. Little dogs. Young dogs. Old dogs. Dogs with issues. Dogs with opinions. Dogs who think they're people. Dogs who have absolutely no idea how big they are. I just love 'em. 

Mia, Bestest Girl

Crazy Charlotte. Not just a name. 

Theo never disappoints

Ole Faithful Maybe

Sugar, My Heartbeat 

The Crew

Penny and Dutch enjoying their 
chew bones and raised beds.
They deserve only the best. 🏆

A favorite daily activity - when Char and Pixie hop in the ring to battle one another. Yep, it's usually Charlotte who winds up running out of the ring first. Luckily, there is always a puperee around to investigate when needed. Thank you, Theo. And even Maybe got in on the puperee action. Somebody has got to keep order around here. 

Somehow, I've ended up with a dog pack that feels less like a collections of pets, and more like a small, furry governing body. There are rules. There are personalities. There are alliances. There are probably meetings I'm not invited to. And somehow, I love every single one of them. 

With my indoor littles and my outdoor bigs - along with Queen Mia who is allowed to pick her place of choice - we all coexist. 

Most days , I feel like I've got it all 💟

And I've saved the best for last......

As much as I love my little house, my barn, my donkeys, horses, chickens, turkey, goats, doggos, cats, and all the beautiful chaos that comes with this life....

The greatest loves of my life are truly Lauren, Brooks and Olive. 

This trifecta of love keeps my soul tank full. A cup that now gets filled daily. What a gift. 

Let's take a look, shall we? 

Apparently, clothing is optional out here. 

We fish
in our underwear

We travel
in style

We work
in the barn

We play
everywhere

We eat
everything

We craft
as much as possible

We live life to the fullest 
in community with one another

And we rest
.....hard

They are my heart, my joy, my grounding place, and the reason behind so much of the life I have built here. We are together. And together we are love. 

Along with the animals that fill my days. 

And the farm that fills my hands. 

But these three...... fill my soul. 

Until next time....please take care of you,

Cyndi

* Did you notice this blogpost turned into a version of 

Where’s waldo Theo?

Me. Every day.

The angst and heartbreak of love

My friends,

If you’ve been following my blog, then you know my sweet farmhand—and truly amazing young woman—Alexis. She’s the kind of girl who can do ALL the things, and, more importantly, she’s always willing to step up and do them. She is, in every sense of the word, a rare gem.

Alexis is now a freshman in college and an aspiring nurse. You go, girl. 💪❤️

Today, it’s with a tender and somewhat heavy heart that I share her words with you. They reflect the pain and grief she’s experiencing as she walks through the agonizing end of a long-term relationship.

We all know there is nothing easy about this kind of heartbreak. And yet, there is something incredibly beautiful about the way Alexis has chosen to put words to her pain. Her willingness to articulate her thoughts and feelings in the middle of such a storm is both courageous and healing. I imagine many of us will recognize pieces of our own stories in hers, because if we’ve lived long enough, most of us have known some version of this kind of loss.

Alexis, please know that we are standing with you—in our thoughts, in our prayers, and in our hearts.

It’s fascinating how the human experience allows us to take our deepest suffering and, somehow, turn it into connection. Even in the darkest seasons, our stories can reach out and remind someone else that they aren’t alone. For that, I am deeply grateful.

Thank you, Alexis, for your vulnerability. Thank you for trusting us with your words and for reminding us that it is safe to be vulnerable—that there is no perfect or prescribed way to move through something hard. Sometimes we simply have to sit in the darkness for a while, grieve what we’ve lost, and allow the people who love us to sit there with us.

And Alexis, please know how much I love you. I’m hurting for you, and I wish I could take some of this pain from you. But I also know this: you are a gift to this world.

Long before you become the nurse you’re dreaming of becoming, and long before life brings whatever other beautiful chapters await you, you have already begun another journey—as a writer.

And what a gift that is.

At such a young age, you have found the courage to turn your heart into words. I cherish those words, and I am so grateful you’ve chosen to share them—not only with me, but with the world.

Keep writing. Keep feeling. Keep healing. And above all, keep becoming the incredible woman you were created to be.

Thank you for gifting us this poignant piece, Alexis. ❤️

It’s been almost a month, and I still think about you every day.

I wonder how much this is affecting you. I wonder if you think about me, if you ever think about texting me, and if you do, what stops you from reaching out.

I can’t help but think about how much of this feels like my fault. I keep replaying everything, wondering if I didn’t love you the way you needed to be loved, if I pushed you too hard, or if I didn’t appreciate you or show my appreciation in the ways I should have.

I still pray almost every day that you’ll come back. Not because I want us to go back to who we were, but because I hope we both become better, individually and together. I hope this time apart teaches us that we can survive without each other, but still choose each other every day.

I just wish you didn’t feel like you had to grow alone or that you couldn’t give me what I needed, because the truth is, you are exactly what I need.

To the boy who became a man for me. I know I used to tease you about not being a man yet, but you stepped up in more ways than I can count.

To the man who made me feel more comfortable than anyone ever has. The man who waited for me. The man who got a Disney+ subscription just so we could watch the movies and shows I loved. The man who would leave flowers on my car with a note just because he was thinking about me or because I’d had a bad day. The man who would pick me up and never let me see the receipt. The man who spent hours in the gym because he wanted to be strong enough to protect me. The man who worked long hours so he could buy me said flowers and take us on dates. The man who was gentle, genuine, patient, and so full of love.

I wish I had told you more often just how much I appreciated all of it. I wish I had made you feel as loved as you made me feel. I’m so sorry that it took losing you for me to fully realize just how much you meant to me.

I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t open up to me about how you were really feeling. I’m sorry if I made you feel unheard. I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you weren’t enough for me or like you weren’t the person I wanted.

Because you are.

You have always been the person I wanted.

I don’t know what the future holds. Maybe our story isn’t over, and maybe it is. But I hope you know that loving you changed me. It taught me what it means to be cared for, protected, and loved with patience. Those are things I’ll always carry with me.

If our paths ever find each other again, I hope we’re both stronger, healthier, and ready to love each other the way we always deserved.

And if not, I hope you never doubt that you were deeply loved, even if I didn’t always know how to show it. You left because you thought you weren’t what I needed. Did you ever consider you were all I ever wanted? 

- Alexis 💔

You’re right, Alice Walker!

" Whatever is mine is looking for me 💜 "    

   - Alice Walker, novelist and poet

Oh, and I certainly can't leave this one out.....

" Peace comes to you by being peace ".

Alice...girl.

Your interviews, your work, your presence - it all feels so grounded.  Calm. Matter-of-fact. Like someone whose been through some things but doesn't need to shout about it.  

You simply are.

Once I heard your words, I couldn't unring that bell. I'm deeply grateful for women who inspire by not only what they say, but by how they move through the world.

Which brings me to this.....

The Cannons have arrived!

Turns out...

We really were looking for one another all along. 

And somehow, with God's steady hands guiding the whole thing - my family found their way back home.

Lauren, Ryan, Brooks (5....almost 6 which I'm told is a very important distinction) and Olive (3) have officially made the move from Gunter to Wolfe City. 

His preferred means for travel 
Why walk when you can ride 

Their 'country' garage awaits them

It's less HGTV and more "where'd we put the rake?"  - which is exactly how it should be.

And every front porch should come with a house chicken

Meet Sweet Costco. She offers complimentary porch delivery service. One fresh egg daily. No subscription required. 

As you probably know, selling a house right now is not easy, fast, nor in your favor. It's a tough market. Yet, there were people who came along and found the property/house of Lauren's advantageous and swooped it up. All with the condition that they move out (fairly) quickly - which they could do. 

And BOOM - merely weeks later, the moving van arrives in front of the rock house, giving way to their furniture and belongings finding their place(s) in the 4 bedroom, 2 bath home that has been patiently waiting for them. Alas, the house came alive. 

The main house on the property - which I identify as the rock house for obvious reasons - is now filled with laughter, love, little girl giggles, little boy monster truck races, snack requests every 17 minutes, and enough joy to fill every room.

Olive waits for Costco to lay her egg,
as though staring intensely at a chicken
speeds up the process
Spoiler: It does not

As they adapt into their own new ways of being, I have found there's additional assistance in the barn. Also, swapping of small children from house to house becomes oddly efficient. And figuring a new way of being - together - knowing a new rhythm will emerge.

Always ready 

Clothing optional

For us both to have our own homes, right next door to each other is the perfect mix of convenience and privacy which brings about happiness and autonomy. 

I'm speaking for myself, but this has felt like the most right thing that's happened in a very long time.

These last few years have been chok full of learning, growing and finding the soul inside of me I had lost. And this new season of life brings about the ability to be with those I love the most while practicing my own new ways of being in the world. How can I show up better, different, and show love in ways that others desire to be loved. Not just how I want to show love. How do they receive love? What does that look like? 

You know where I've missed the mark? Is learning that I need to ask them how they feel and receive love. I was never taught that in my life, that it's important and imperative to actually ask others how they desire to be loved and receive love. 

Also, add in during this time of growth and closeness with those I love the most, I know that I need to have the ability to hold my container of my own emotional regulation. Wow - I know that sounds deep because it is. But I've learned that I can practice to dip into what others are feeling, sense it in my body, be a better listener, and not allow myself to get washed away with someone else's emotions. This is a practice, friends, I'm not perfect with this, but having my family here lends to practicing new ways of being, this included.

Sometimes, my biggest breakthroughs have begun with realizing, "Ohhhhh, I've been accidentally doing that for decades." But the beautiful part of this? Is that awareness brings us choices.  

You see, in the past, I've been guilty of feeling the need to attempt to regulate another's emotions. It became a way of life. In an attempt to change my own behavior and combat this way of being with others, I've begun to recognize when an opportunity arises, so that I can shift my own behavior from feeling the need to regulate someone else's emotions to regulating my own, so they may, in turn, regulate their own emotions. I'm working on keeping a grounded presence, all while showing my nervous system that I can be close to someone's struggle without it becoming mine. Ugh. My goal? Love others deeply yet still have the ability to stay in my own body. It's a full time job. Growth is weird like that. 

Yes, this was, and has been, a complex ah-ha moment for me. It's hard when I learn things I was/am doing that was not in the best interest of others - or myself. Thank you, therapy. But I've also learned that this is (merely) a part of the growth I need to work on and have been given the opportunity to practice these life skills not only at home, but at work and out in the world. 

So while my family has arrived (yay!!) and I am loving it, leaning into it and feeling the peace it brings, it also boils down to this:

Cyndi, please pause

Think about the emotional skills you've gained

Try to try, to apply them appropriately

Try not to f it up, and if you do, apologize and repair, and keep trying to try

Show your love, girl

In a healthy way

Keep practicing, and practice some more

To have my family here now, gives me ALL the more reasons to be the mom, nana, friend and person they deserve

And that I deserve to be 💛

You know who else deserves a safe space?

Meet Snowy.

Before, at arrival

After, 2 weeks later

Snowy has a story that we'll never fully know. 

You see, he was living in Gunter as a stray. Lauren and Ryan begin to notice him around at times, and would feed him when the opportunity arose, along with another good Samaritan neighbor who was also trying to help feed and care for him. He was merely trying to survive, when at the request of Lauren, the other neighbor was able to catch him, and then agreed to meet me so that I can take him and provide him a home of his own.

He's young, still a pup, just under 1 year old. He's goofy, not yet able to fully control his big body, and hungry. Always hungry and eating like he's trying to make up for all the lost meals he never had. 

In this short 2 weeks, we've gotten him neutered, dewormed and treated for mange. He's kind of a mess as most stray dogs are. Yet as stray dogs often do, they bounce back when shown love and kindness - and food - and he's settling in nicely.

We tried many names out. Charlie, Echo, Crush - but the kids kept calling him Snowy because he's all white and that's what makes perfect sense in their little brains. The tiny people have spoken. Case closed. He's Snowy.

We'll get that eye figured out, too

In an effort to help Snowy realize this is his furever home, I kept him on a tie-out so he could not run away. I did this for a little over a week, and now he's living free and easy here on the farm. He is completely unconfined and runs around with all the dogs here. Penny and Dutch have begun the acceptance process and understand there's a new Great Pyrenees on site, but are still doing their own teachings with him on whose the boss. And for the record, the boss is not Snowy. That's a lesson still in progress. 

His best friend is Mia. He absolutely loves her and she's his dog-playmate. He does love to play as pups do, but also loves to chew on anything besides a real chew toy. So please keep all shoes and 'chewables' up and out of reach. 

Mia has been a magnificent mentor for Snowy. She has shown him it's okay to feel safe here. She shows him that she doesn't run away - nor should he. We're learning slowly, how to shed the idea of food aggression, and that he'll have food for when he's hungry. We are learning that chickens are not playmates - nor a meal. That's another lesson still in progress - although no chickens have been harmed in this education process.

Will he guard with Penny and Dutch? I don't have an answer to that yet. I'm hoping with time he will. But for now, he's busy eating food whenever possible, chewing things that are not meant to be chewed and playing with his best friend, Mia. That will be fine, Snowy. And I can tell you from my own experience, I'm still learning about life too, my friend. We'll keep growing together. 

Snowy  12/10   Would rescue again.

Speaking of growing! 

Olive turned 3❣

We celebrated Olive at home

......and at her party with friends

Lots of birthday fun had at the park

Olive had her 3rd birthday party with her friends at Old Celina Park, where the kids played in the Splash Pad and on the playground. 

Since it was a early morning party, donuts were the sweet of choice, while the heat was kept at bay. It was so much fun for everyone!

I checked, it's in the birthday handbook that 
she gets to eat 3 donuts - tops only, of course

Have you ever read the book:
'The Berenstains Bears,
Too Much Birthday'

It's hard to hold a steady pace when your turning 3. Your either sprinting full speed towards your next adventure - or lying dramatically on the ground because your sock feels weird. There is no middle gear.

How's everybody holding up with this heat?

So far so okay. The heat is hard for chickens. And frankly, bitterly cold weather is easier for them than this hot hot heat. I've got fans going, lots of fresh water and plenty of shade. Hang in there, girlz!

Not the only fan - just their favorite fan. 

Impossibly adorable 💕

Fans, lots of water and a salt block
and they are doing great as well 💟
* Hope is standing behind me, supervising

from left to right,
Kitty, Cricket and June Bug
Morning feed time - and they are 
surviving the heat ✅

It's cool inside, right Pixie?
My Pixie Pie has grown into a 
beautiful onyx cat.
Eyesight is overrated.

Alrighty y'all, things have been wonderfully busy 'round these parts. 

Take into account that there's many layers to a move like this, such as school changes, possible work changes, home-life changes and it can be overwhelming. The Cannon's are making all the magic happen. Factor in that Lauren quit her librarian job to stay home now, and then after one day at home, had a job offer from another library in the area. The opportunities are plentiful - and I'll keep you posted on how it all shakes out. Who will work - and work where? Where will the kids be going to school now? I can't wait to watch it all unfold - right outside my front door.

We are just getting started.

Please stay cool in this heat. And if you happen to have a porch chicken.....please thank her for her service. 

Cyndi